Entry has closed. entries made up to and including the 25th April will be receiving cress shortly

Entry to this year’s competition is via a simple form. The responses provided will be a useful tool for weeding out the timewasters or those incapable of following the most basic of rules.

If I receive too many entries and need to whittle the numbers down I’ll take into account your fame and also your Twitter history – if you only tweet once a year to complain that Sainsbury’s put the wrong price on something that will probably count against you.

Finally, I’m bound to make mistakes/typos as I do this. I absolutely love it when people point them out.